A hand can do wonders
by ilovetheformat
Summary: Draco entertains himself by touching Harry in an inappropriate way… DH. Contains Weird!Ron and Weird!Hermione. RomanceHumor. Please R&R! Rated R to be safe.
1. Weird Train Ride

Summary: Draco entertains himself by touching Harry in an inappropriate way… D/H. Contains Weird!Ron and Weird!Hermione. Romance/Humor. Please R&R!

Rating: R

Genre: Romance/Humor

Warning: This story contains slash, meaning guy on guy action. You have been warned!

Disclaimer: I don't own or have anything to do with all the HP characters or any related material.

Author's Note: Hello my peeps, I'm just letting you guys know that this story takes place after the war. And Voldemort is dead along with Lucius Malfoy. Thanks and good readings. :)

"bubba"dialogue

'_bubba_' thoughts

* * *

**Chapter 1: **

There was loud clambering everywhere and students were quickly boarding the Hogwarts Express, as it was about to leave.

Harry Potter, the last student to get on, ran quickly inside to find Ron and Hermione. Spotting a red head, he slammed the door open only to find that it was Ginny who was apparently snogging a boy he didn't know.

"Ahem…right…well forget I was even here,"

And with that he closed the door shut.

Harry continued on with his looking down the far end of the train, where he bumped and fell on top of someone who was obviously getting out of a compartment.

"Oof…"

Silence

"Well well well look who decided to show up late," a voice drawled.

"Malfoy"

"Potter"

"I'd love to continue to state the obvious with you but I have to go. So if you would get yourself off of me…"

"Oh right," Harry blushed realizing he was on top of the blond haired male.

Malfoy glanced at Harry quietly before he departed to the other end of the train.

"Hey mate how come you were so late?" asked Ron.

Ron and Hermione were the people in the compartment Malfoy had come out of.

"Well Ron it was the Dursley's, they drove me over here a bit late…oh and hey Hermione,"

"Hey Harry, but tell me why did they drive you here so late? Shouldn't they be quick to drop you off, as this is your last year with them? Don't they want to get rid of you quick?" Hermione bombarded with questions.

"Whoa Hermione take it slow. Oh and thanks I'm flattered. Hah. Well, it took my uncle a while since he wanted to give me a little goodbye present…"

"Oh, well that's awfully nice of him but why exactly?" Hermione had her brows raised in a questioning look.

"Well, it wasn't exactly a _nice _goodbye present…"

"What?! Harry what did they do to you?" the brown haired girl practically screamed.

Silence

"Well…"

"Well what?"

"It's nothing…"

"It's something!"

"Ahh 'Mione leave him alone if Harry doesn't want to tell us he doesn't have to," Ron spoke up.

"Uhh…thanks Ron,"

"Hphm," Hermione looked out the window with a frustrated expression.

"So mate do you want a lemon drop?" asked Ron with a concerned look on his face.

"Meow"

"Haha Ron. You know you're starting to sound like Dumbledore."

"Meow"

"What? Oh…yeah Dumbledore…ha! Good one…"

"Meow"

"Hermione! Would you please stop with the 'meowing' sounds?" Harry asked being annoyed.

"Hphm," Hermione repeated.

"Right…thanks it was kinda getting on my last nerve. So you guys never told me why Malfoy was in here."

"He came in here asking for you, probably to pick a fight or something."

"Oh ok."

'_Damn Malfoy's seriously obsessed with making me miserable.'_

The rest of the train ride was silent as the Hogwarts Express pulled into Hogsmeade

**AN: Sorry this chapter was so short, the holidays are here and I'm busy. I'll update as soon as I can with more of Draco. Review!**


	2. Ron's new hero and Potions

Warning: This story contains slash, meaning guy on guy action. You have been warned!

Disclaimer: I don't own or have anything to do with all the HP characters or any related material.

**AN: I want to thank all the reviewers, you guys rock and made me update. Hah. Well, here goes nothing…**

"bubba"dialogue

'_bubba_' thoughts

* * *

**Chapter 2: **

Back in the Hogwarts castle for their final year, the trio hurried to the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall. Where Dumbledore did his welcome speech and Ron seemed to be paying extra attention.

'_I think Ron has a new hero…' _Harry thought while watching the red haired boy snatch up a lemon drop.

* * *

"Ugh, guess who we have for the whole day?" Harry asked Ron & Hermione.

"Don't tell me we have all our classes with the Slytherins today, please don't!" Ron whined.

"Okay, I won't" Harry shrugged.

"Oh shut it Harry," Hermione snapped.

"Sorry, what's your problem?"

'_She's been acting weirder than Ron…ok not _that _weird but weird nonetheless.'_

"Oh none of your business. Besides you're a guy so you wouldn't understand!" Hermione ran out of the Great Hall dramatically.

"I'm a guy and I understand what's going on with 'Mione" stated Ron.

"What?! What's wrong with her?"

'_And aren't you supposed to be the thick one?'_

"She's obviously going through something we wouldn't understand. So I'm guessing she's either going through menstruation or a guy has broken her heart," Ron stated as if it was an obvious fact while chewing violently on a lemon drop.

"Oh" was the blunt reply from the Golden Boy.

'_Ron is scaring me…and he really needs to stop with those lemon drops. Honestly he would make Dumbledore have a run for his money.'_

* * *

Potions had started and the golden trio was still trying to get to class. Ron and his clumsy self had dropped all of his belongings from his bag, including ink bottles that shattered. When they finally to Potions it was already 15 minutes from the start of class.

* * *

With a bang of the doors Ron, Hermione, and Harry entered the Potions dungeon.

"Well, well, well look who decided to show up late," Snape drawled. (AN: Does that sound familiar? Hint: Look at the last chapter)

"Sorry Professor, I tripped and dropped all of my things. Harry and Hermione helped me clean up…" Ron apologized.

"10 points each for being late to class and 5 points for being a clumsy footed boy," Snape smirked victoriously for having an excuse to take off more points from Gryffindor.

Ron, Hermione, and Harry took the three empty seats at the front of the classroom. Unfortunately (AN: Not!) Harry had to sit next to Malfoy since Ron & Hermione took seats next to each other.

Harry, before sitting down looked frantically around to make sure there weren't any other empty seats. There wasn't. With a sigh he plopped down next to the blond.

"Look who enjoys my company," whispered Malfoy.

"Oh sod off Malfoy," Harry whispered harshly.

Malfoy just smirked.

* * *

The class continued with Snape droning on about some Potion. Unfortunately Harry got a bit _too _bored and fell asleep. The last thing he felt was Malfoy's leg come in contact with his own….

**AN: I'm soo sorry for yet another short chapter but today is Christmas Eve so ya know…**


	3. Touching and Frustrations

Disclaimer: I don't own or have anything to do with all the HP characters or any related material. So don't kill me, or worse: sue! Hah just kidding that's not worse.

Author's Note: **Hello everybody…yes I am indeed back. The mighty warrior is here to----eh whatever. Anyways, I'm soooooooooooooooo sorry x57483920768954. I do realize I haven't written anything for a long time (freaking Christmas!) and I apologize. Please dismiss you diabolical plan to kill me now…yes now would be a good time. But hey! Look on the Brightside I'm back and better than ever! Heh I'll let you be the judge of that. I want to thank Darkness-Angel-2004 for snapping me out of it because I probably would have gone a longer time before posting this, I felt so bad when I saw that the last time I updated was in 2004. You know what I'm going to do now? I'm going to shut up so you can read the story, yeah that sounds good, right? Okay.**

Don't forget, you weirdo. J/k I love you….not. J/k again.

"Insert words here" -----that is dialogue.

'_Insert words here_' ------that is thoughts.

**_Recap:_ **The trio arrived late to Potions thanks to Ron.

Ron, Hermione, and Harry took the three empty seats at the front of the classroom. Unfortunately, Harry had to sit next to Malfoy since Ron & 'Mione sat next to each other.

The class continued with Snape droning on about some potion. Unfortunately, Harry became a bit too bored and fell asleep. The last thing he felt was Malfoy's leg come in contact with his own...

_

* * *

_

Chapter 3: Touching and Frustrations

_----_Dream Sequence_----_

_Somebody was on top of him but somehow he didn't mind. A wet tongue traced every inch of his neck and hands started roaming his chest._

_"Mmm Draco," Harry moaned arching his neck._

_The hands were going lower and lower until Snape was suddenly shouting so loud it was disturbing his dream._

_----_Dream Sequence Ends_-----_

_'Hmm, I wonder who he's yelling at.'_

"Mr. Potter I'd love to hear more of your fantasies about Mr. Malfoy but I've have a lesson to teach," Snape sneered.

The class erupted with laughter as Harry blushed crimson.

_'Oh fuck. I was talking in my sleep…wait why was I, Harry Potter dreaming about Draco Malfoy?'_

Harry turned to his right to see the blonde's reaction and was surprised to find Draco blushing light pink. At being caught however, Malfoy quickly smirked and whispered so only Harry could hear him.

"I knew you wanted me Potter, ever since I fond out you were gay"

Those words only caused the black-haired boy to blush a deeper color of red. But then it finally hit him that Malfoy's leg was still touching his. Slowly but noticeably, Harry moved his knee away. That action only made Malfoy smirk wider.

All through the rest of the class Slytherins moaned Draco's name in Harry's direction every chance they received.

Painfully slow, class ended and everyone started to pack their belongings. Harry had his back turned, so the perfect idea popped into Draco's scheming mind. The blond grabbed the other boy's bum and squeezed. Harry, of course, jumped (AN: what would you do?) up in surprise.

"Malfoy, what the h----"

"Later Potter,"

Unfortunately, everyone left in the classroom saw what Malfoy did; catcalls, whistling, and more moaning were now thrown Harry's way.

"Harry, what happened?" Ron asked with his brow furrowed.

"Well, he just…I didn't…he…my…I'm confused," Harry finished lamely.

The Golden Boy turned to look at Hermione and see her opinion, only to see an unreadable look sketched on her face.

"'Mione, what's wrong?"

"T-that was just incredibly hot," the bushy-haired girl squeaked and skipped away.

"Um…I think that just made her day," Harry blushed.

_'Is this the Hermione I know or is this her evil twin. I'm hoping it's the latter.'_

"Ahem, don't you want to know what I think about all this?" Ron spoke up.

"Um alright then,"

"Well go ahead then, ask."

Harry replied, "Ugh fine then. What do you think about this Ron?"

"Thank you for asking,"

"Well!" Harry asked right after Ron spoke with a weird hand motion. The poor boy was getting frustrated.

"I was just getting to that," Ron became stern.

"Well then why don't you just spit it out!"

"Spit what out?" the freckled boy became confused, "And if you're going to be bloody rude about it I won't say anything."

"Ugh," Harry covered his face with his hands, "Look Ron, I'm sorry I just got a bit carried away that's all."

"That's okay I guess," Ron smiled.

"Um mate?"

"Yeah"

"You still haven't told me your opinion,"

"Oh right, sorry. Well, here goes…"

"Yes?" Harry leaned closer to his weird best friend.

"I'm fine with it as long as you are…lemon drop?" the red-haired boy finally answered with a concerned look on his face.

"Oh…uhh thanks? And no thanks,"

"Fine but you don't know what you're missing,"

Harry sighed and rolled his eyes.

The rest of the day went normal since they had Transfiguration and McGonagall was keeping a sharp eye. No one was bothering Harry about 'it'…during that class at least. Care of Magical Creatures was a different story. Hagrid was very oblivious about what was going on during his classes.

The sun was shining brightly since they were outside, and everyone was wearing their muggle clothes…if they wanted to or if they had any. The new policy let students wear their choice of clothing while being outside and/or after classes.

Harry didn't have to wear Dudley's old clothes ever since he threatened the Dursley's into giving him money. Yes indeed the boy did not have to wear rags anymore. Hallelujah! Instead, he was wearing a tight dark green t-shirt along with some tight fitting jeans and a studded belt that had a star belt buckle. On his feet were old ripped black converse.

Harry's bangs fell lightly across his face and with the glasses gone, you can say golden boy looked all-around beautifully-sexy.

Of course Draco looking like his handsome self noticed this and couldn't stop himself from checking the other boy out. But being the oblivious guy, Harry had nooo idea.

_'Damn I must admit Potter sure looks hot. I don't give a flying fuck that we're 'enemies' he has a nice arse…'_

_

* * *

_

All throughout Care of Magical Creatures Harry was being thrown crumbled up pieces of parchment that contained exotic drawings of Malfoy doing unspeakable things to him. The brunette was very embarrassed to say the least.

Draco on the other hand thought it to be a bit humorous and decided to have fun with it.

_'Hmm I know the grab Potter's arse thing works so I think I'll do that a bit more often. Then after he gets used to it maybe I can get more out of it. Hah I'm a genius. I get to tease Potter and get different types of pleasure out of it, if you know what I mean. Muahahaha! Muahahaha!_

_Insert evil laughter here_

_----Choke---_

_'Yeah…ok I need to stop that. Hey where's everybody!'_

It turns out that our Drakie had actually laughed out loud and a little too loud, if I might add. Everyone had scooted away from him and now stared on in amazement at the blond.

Silence-----------

"Ahem you can go back to teaching," he pointed to Hagrid, "And you can go back to learning," Draco moved his hands around to include all the class.

More Silence----------

"Damn it! Everybody just stop looking at my handsome self and go back to doing whatever it was that you were doing!"

A couple seconds of Silence before…. ----------

The whole class shrugged their shoulders and went back to doing "whatever it was that they were doing."


End file.
